Nigeria customs...

Well,

Sorry...meant to post this last week, but internet was really bad and then i went away for a few days....

Not much new to report on, in terms of my work and travel. I surprisingly did not get sick after eating a furry lamb’s tail! It is however, getting very hot again here, but at least we aren’t getting snow! So, instead of talking about work, I will talk about Nigeria customs and culture, as it is pretty fascinating stuff.

I am officially settled into my flat here in Abuja. It is slowly becoming a home. As is custom here, I am planning for my house warming party, where it gets blessed and then we drink and eat!! I have a huge bbq pit behind my flat, so we will have one heck of a cook up. The good thing is I have hired someone, Mary, who lives in my boys quarters (a separate building for hired help to live in), and she knows how to cook Nigerian, so I am sure she will be a huge help! She is very sweet and innocent…she said she was happy to find me, as every other house that she interviewed at, the men told her she “had to sleep with them” if she wanted the job. From what I have recently learned, this actually happens alot, and most women are desperate for work, that they have no choice…so clearly, sexual slavery is alive and well in Nigeria! She has asked if her sister Lydia can also live with her, as she needs out of her current situation (from the sound of it, this sister has been being abused by her employer)…I didn’t hesitate to agree…it is just one room they share, but whatever gets her out of her situation... They do everything for me, that I am a little nervous for when I return to the “developed” world, I will be a little useless, and not be able to take care of myself! I may just have to bring them with me, as they are of course desperate to get out of Nigeria…I am sure they would make really great nannies…too bad I don’t quite see kids in my near future.

I can now also be called a matchmaker…it just so happened that one of the driver’s (Soda) I use on weekends is single…he came to pick us up to take us to the market (she is an excellent negotiator, so I just give her the money, and that way I don’t get completely and ridiculously ripped off!!)…it was very cute, as they were very much flirting. Mary is from the north and her family all lives up there, so as I am now considered family, so Soda shows up at my door in his best suit and then asked me about her, and my permission to “accompany me and her to church”! He then proceeded to show my his CV, not quite a work CV, but a success CV!! The jobs he has held, and the money he saves monthly, and how much he sends home to his family, also in the north, as well as 2 letters of recommendation! I thought this was all great and sweet, but I was a little stuck with the church thing…in Nigeria church on Sunday is a full day affair, starting at 6am, going late into the evening. As a bit of a lapsed Christian…alright fully lapsed Christian, this was a bit much…but also because once you start this process, you are expected every week. So a bit of a dilemma…but another problem in all of this is that never once is Mary asked if she wants to go to church with him or if she is interested, as this is not custom. The African way, is the man chooses his wife, and she has no real say…I expected this from muslim, but not so much from Christians. But, thankfully she actually thinks he is very polite…interesting way to describe a man, but I guess that is important here! If everything works out, they are usually married within 3 months, so while I hope it works out for them, I really hope that I don’t lose her…yes, I know, I am spoiled, but it is a way of helping out locals here.

It is a good thing Obama won in the US…and an exciting time to be in Africa. There were big street parties all over Nigeria, and from what I understand, all over Africa when it was announced that he had won. People everywhere that day kept on coming up to me and congratulating me…they think that because I am white and don’t have a “funny” accent (like the Brits) that I must be American…but it was all good, and actually relatively peaceful, without gun shots ringing out to show their excitement, as this is the usual way of celebrating here ( a little known fact – about 500 people die a year here from people ‘celebrating’ with guns!!)

Anyways, I will write more soon…as work is starting to get interesting again.

Ciao, andrea